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We think of the word “engineer” as putting a screw and a bolt together but not in terms of fitting skills to improve the functionality of our lives. Until now…because the word applies exactly to being an effective manager of our words, actions, decisions, attitude and in general what we bring to the “table of living life” especially effective communication!
How to do it?
Following are 6 steps to engineer effective communication into your life
The 3 Levels of Effective Communication 
The first task at hand is to learn to speak in a way that summons both parts of your brain, the Neo Cortex and the Limbic, otherwise known as left and right hemispheres. The way to do it is by consciously being theatrical with your body language and tone of voice.
Huge amount of research has shown that words only have 7% effect on the communication message while body language accounts for 40% and tone of voice for 50%!!!
This means that through non verbal communication the effect of words increases by almost 15 times or stays at a 7% level of effectiveness.
That’s where effective communication begins: The Mastery of These 3 Levels.
I trained thousands of people and the results are amazing and very quick, because once you are conscious of your ability to speak with meaning it only gets better.
Make Sure Your Listener Is Your Stake Holder 
Everyone communicates but very few align their communication to their listener. Whether it is one or a thousand, remember that you have to speak their language, appeal to their feelings, wishes, values and more. Otherwise you can say the most amazing things but they won’t get you. People want to know that they are seen and valued. Effective Communication will reach them!
Using effective communication as a tool to strategically shape your life can bring a new level of purpose and satisfaction to both your personal and professional development. When you intentionally apply principles of effective communication to your life, you’re able to pursue goals, build stronger relationships, and find deeper meaning in everyday interactions. Here’s a comprehensive guide to getting started.
Define Your Vision and Purpose
Effective communication begins with having a clear vision and understanding of your life’s purpose:
- Identify Core Values: Think about what you truly value in life. Consider the qualities, goals, and experiences that are most important to you.
- Envision Your Ideal Future: What does your best life look like? Picture the milestones and achievements you want in various parts of your life, like your career, relationships, and personal growth.
- Craft a Personal Mission Statement: Write a mission statement that reflects your purpose. This mission can guide how you use effective communication in every aspect of your life, keeping you aligned with what truly matters.
Laying this foundation of vision and purpose empowers you to use effective communication as a tool to bring clarity and direction to both your internal goals and external interactions.
Develop a Personal Life Strategy
Once your vision and purpose are defined, the next step is to create a strategic plan for your life. Having a clear roadmap will help you prioritize and stay focused:
- Assess Your Current Life Investments: Evaluate where your time, energy, and focus are currently going. Are these investments supporting your vision?
- Identify Areas for Change: Recognize where you may need to shift your time and energy to align more closely with your goals.
- Set Specific Goals: Establish measurable objectives for the areas that matter most to you. Effective communication will help you define and maintain these goals, and ensure you stay motivated.
- Create a Life Strategy Summary: Summarize your life plan on one page, highlighting your vision, key goals, and the strategies you’ll use. This summary can act as a quick reference to keep you grounded and focused on what’s important.
By creating a personal life strategy, you’ll have a roadmap that allows you to engage in effective communication intentionally, ensuring your conversations and interactions support your goals.
Master Effective Communication Skills
To follow through with your personal strategy, building a strong foundation of effective communication skills is essential:
- Active Listening: Truly listen when others speak, showing empathy and patience. This helps you understand people better and fosters trust.
- Clear Expression: Practice expressing your thoughts clearly and concisely. This makes it easier for others to understand your perspective.
- Critical Thinking: Analyzing situations and understanding motives helps you communicate with a strategic mindset.
- Emotional Intelligence: Cultivating empathy allows you to understand the feelings and perspectives of others, helping you communicate in a way that resonates.
- Public Speaking: Working on public speaking can boost your confidence and ability to share ideas in any setting.
- Written Communication: Improving your writing helps ensure that your emails, messages, and other written communications are impactful and professional.
These skills will allow you to engage in effective communication in all areas of your life, making sure you connect meaningfully with others and leave a positive impression.
Apply Effective Communication in Key Life Areas
With your skills in place, it’s time to apply effective communication across different areas of your life to bring tangible benefits:
- Career Growth: Use effective communication to showcase your value, negotiate well, and strengthen professional relationships. Clear communication helps you make a strong case for your ideas and contributions.
- Personal Relationships: In relationships, effective communication can bridge misunderstandings, clarify your needs, and deepen your connections.
- Personal Growth: Reframe obstacles as opportunities by shifting your internal dialogue from “I have to” to “I get to,” creating a more positive outlook.
- Goal Achievement: Define your goals clearly for yourself and others. Communicate these goals to those who support you, and hold yourself accountable.
- Leadership: Whether in a personal or professional setting, use effective communication to inspire, motivate, and lead others.
Applying effective communication to these areas can make your life more fulfilling, improve your relationships, and help you achieve greater career success.
Continuously Refine Your Approach 
Effective communication is a skill that requires constant refinement:
- Assess and Adjust: Regularly evaluate how well your communication strategies are working. Reflect on what’s effective and what could be improved.
- Seek Feedback: Ask others for feedback on your communication style. Constructive input can help you become more aware of your impact.
- Stay Updated on Techniques: Especially in the digital era, new tools and methods for effective communication are always emerging. Stay informed and adapt as needed.
- Adjust Your Strategies with Life Changes: As your goals and circumstances evolve, so should your approach to communication. Revisit your strategies regularly to ensure they continue to align with your vision.
By staying proactive and flexible, you can continuously improve your effective communication skills, helping you remain adaptable and impactful.
Cultivate an Effective Communication Mindset 
Building an effective communication mindset is key to integrating these principles into your daily life:
- Communicate with Intention: Approach each interaction with purpose, aiming to make a positive impact.
- Simplify Complex Ideas: Effective communication often requires translating complicated ideas into simple, relatable language.
- Focus on Impact Over Eloquence: Aim for clarity and understanding rather than perfect word choice.
- Commit to Ongoing Improvement: Like any skill, effective communication requires practice. Look for opportunities to challenge yourself and grow.
When you develop this mindset, effective communication becomes a natural part of who you are, empowering you to lead a more intentional and connected life.
Embrace Effective Communication for a Better Life
Now is the time to take action and use effective communication as the key to engineering a purposeful and fulfilling life. Define your values, build your life strategy, master essential communication skills, and apply these tools across every area of your life.
Stay committed to improvement, be open to change, and never underestimate the power of effective communication. By doing so, you’ll unlock your potential and bring your personal and professional dreams within reach.
Start today—take charge of your life with effective communication, and make each interaction meaningful.
Eli Harari The Life Coach for Professionals™